I'll get through this

It's funny. I just realized I write more here either when I'm heartbroken or too happy and so much in love. Writings really is a therapy. I can release the negative emotions and in the happier times, magnify that happiness by a hundred times over.

Today is his birthday. I really wanted to celebrate it with him before and somehow I feel a bit of a loss. Then again, it's not my fault.

Because I still felt a bit down, I started questioning the reality of love and whether or not I should believe it. Then again, I guess no matter how painful it is, I will still find myself believing that true love exists. A kind of love that will make the hurt go away and never return. I hope it's not wishful thinking. Haha soon enough, when the pain subsides, a new love will begin. Be it not a romantic kind of love, yet a kind that will make my heart feel lighter.

HBD '14

I've been celebrating your birthday for the past 5 years. First, we spent it with my sis and your friends at your house. Second, I gave you a surprise cake from Max's and cooked spaghetti.  Third, I gave you a cake from Bakerite and treated you to Gumbo's. Fourth, we've broken up by then. You had a gf then and I just sent you a message. Fifth, was last year. You joined a marathon and I was there with you and Tito. I gave you a runner's cap. And now, I don't even want to greet you. You broke my heart. Even wanted to forget this day altogether but that's just ain't happening, right? I wanna write you off the face of the Earth. I hate you, womanizer, you, liar! Cheater! Have a happy fucked up life, you stupid moronic person! I just hate you. FU.

This is what I wrote earlier yet through it all I can't help but at least greet you a happy birthday. I'm seen zoned. Not even a thank you at that but oh well. I shouldn't care much.