Love and Sadness

I'm stuck with this overwhelming sense of sadness. It's like my heart wants to break into a thousand pieces. I am so lost right now. I don't have someone to keep me grounded anymore. I'm floating, yet I keep tripping and falling. I'm so sad right now. My heart wanders to the place where I've been for the last two years. All the love and the memories. It strangles me and drowns me. I'm confused and hurt yet there's no one else to blame but myself.

I keep thinking what was so important that I had to leave my comfort zone. I keep thinking that if I stayed there I wouldn't have this feeling. I could have saved myself from all these unnecessary pains. Yet, I have to realize that I'm doing this for my own good. Love will not sustain me forever. One needs safety and stability. I need what I want. I want what I need. Someone who is not necessarily the right person but will make himself right for me. Someone who will love me and take care of me. Someone who frequently checks on me. Someone who picks me up after work though he himself has had a rough day. Someone who never allows me to go home by myself. Someone who would always be glad to see me and always greet me with a smile. A person who will go out of his way just for me.

In every relationship it is always I who gives my all. I always end up taking care of the person I love. It's fine...but I need to be taken cared off too. I need to be loved in the way that is recognizable to me. I need my love to speak my language. I need him to learn my love language and I need to learn his as well.

I'm getting tired of crying...I don't wanna hurt anymore...