Your Happiness

Just when I thought that everything will be okay this happened. I don't know what to do anymore. Will holding on make me any closer to him? How can I compete? Will my love be enough? I thought that the worst was over. I was wrong. This is far worse. I'm losing him all over again. No matter how much effort I put in it, he keeps pulling away. Is the world tearing us apart?

Waiting without assurance. It's the same thing he did when I felt the way he does now. I hope it will end in the same way. I hope he finds his way back to me. I really love him. More than anything in the world, I love him. There's nothing I wouldn't do just to have him back. But then again, what if he's happier with her? What's more give? What's more to do?

My heart aches. My eyes are puffy from crying. Yet I cannot describe this pain I'm feeling.

My love, I hope you find your way back...I hope you'd pick me. I hope that you'd love me the same way you did back then. Yet I have no say in your decision. I love you but your happiness is what matters most to me. I hope you'd be happy...and yet I wish that your happiness is to be with me...

I love you, Turtle...I wanna be your Cubbie Shell again...